Good thing you didn’t overpay to wait in the rain…

… Because if you did decide to spend the time and money to be able to say you were at the Cubs 2009 opening day, you’re going to be treated with one hell of a lineup.

LF Soriano
SS Theriot
RF Fukudome
1B Lee
3B Fontenot
CF Johnson
2B Miles
C Hill
P Lilly

Well, that’s, um, a let down. Aramis Ramirez has a stiff neck, Milton Bradley strained his groin and Geovany Soto’s arm still hurts. But I would like to point out that mere hours after I suggested that Derrek Lee might be better suited in a location other that third, Lou Piniella bats him in a location other than third. Is Lou a big fan of Midwest Swing? Maybe. But I like to think the reason is because I can read minds. That’s why I’m reading yours right now. Stop thinking that — it’s gross — besides, how would you even be able to acquire a snapping turtle in the first place?

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