Recaps before the hated Sox come to town.

by Andy Paschen

Cubs lose the series against the Astros, Twins: W-L-L, L-L-W
Cubs Series Record through Wednesday: 8-8-8 (30-30 overall)

It’s a light recap this week. Partly because I’ll be overflowing your precious little lives with Cubs-Sox posts throughout the week and partly because nobody like to read about the Cubs losing. Later in the evening there will be linkdumps to all the Cubs-Sox info you need as well as additional Cubs-Sox posts. I promise.

Bullpen GPA:
Through intense research and analysis (guess-work) I have decided that if the Cubs are to make the playoffs the bullpen must pitch at a B average for the entire season. So, in order to determine if there is any accuracy in this statement I am chronicling the work of the Cubs’ pen.

Tuesday: B.
Wednesday: C-. Angel “El Pobrecito” Guzman surrenders the GWRBI (Game-winning RBI) in the bottom of the ninth.
Thursday: B.
Friday: B-.
Saturday: A. An “A” means no ERs.
Sunday: A. See above.

Bullpen season GPA: 2.84(B-) GPA through 60 games, down .01 from last week. Angel Guzman’s blunder in the bottom of the ninth on Wednesday hit the Cubs pretty hard, and though the relievers did as well as one could ask of them in all of the Cubs’ recent extra inning games, losses are still losses and they are the pitchers responsible for giving up those runs.

Hero/Goat season leaders:
When it comes to team MVP, people usually stick with the numbers. But at the end of the season, I want to know which player had a direct impact on the outcome of the game the most. To name my Cub season MVP (and LVP), I am keeping track of the game’s heroes and goats in order to determine a winner. Usually it is one game, one hero/goat, but that is by no means a written-in-stone rule.

Tuesday’s Hero: Ted Lilly. 6.2 IP, 0 ER. And now you know the rest of the story.
Wednesday’s Goat: All of the hitters. All of ’em. It’s truly pathetic when you can only muster three men in scoring position in one nine-inning affair.
Thursday’s Goat: All of the hitters again. 0-6 with RISP means nobody did their job. Not a one. For shame Chicago Cubs, for shame.
Friday’s Goat: Milton Bradley. As Lou Piniella said, “Do we need to go over counting? 1 … 2 … 3.” Look for the Cubs to rectify their mathematical errors by signing this man as an extra bench coach.

1... 2 ... 3 outs! Ah ha ha ha ha!

1... 2 ... 3 outs! Ah ha ha ha ha!

Saturday’s Goat: Kosuke Fukudome. 0-4 with 2 spiraling, swirling strikeouts and 2 runners left in scoring position. When Kosuke starts looking like a ballerina, you can be pretty certain the batting average is going down faster than a sorostitute at the end of a hay ride.
Sunday’s Hero: Ryan Theriot. With the game winning RBI in the bottom of the ninth to finish a 2-3, 2 RBI day off Ryan Theriot earns himself a gold star from Midwest Swing.

Hero Squad: Number is games chosen as hero/goat.
5– Soriano
4 – Johnson, Lilly
3 – Theriot, Zambrano
2 – Fukudome, Ramirez
1 – Ascanio, Bradley, Dempster, Fontenot, Gregg, Guzman, Harden, Hoffpauir, Lee, Marmol, Marshall, Scales, Soto
Goat Bastards:
5– Bradley
3– Cotts, Fontenot, Hoffpauir, Patton, Soto
2 –
All of the hitters, Gregg, Heilman
1 – Fox, Fukudome, Harden, Lee, Marmol, Marshall, Samardzija, Scales, Soriano


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