That’s the way the Cubby Crumbles

Well he's understandably miffed.

Well he's understandably miffed.

By Josh Mosley

My associate Mr. Andrew Paschen made a rather humorous post about some of my Cardinal brethren falling out of the stands. They’re like the lazy eyed cousin with a drinking problem that is undeniably your cousin but you aren’t necessarily proud to claim them.

But this was an eventful weekend for the North siders as well. Andy will probably recap the Sox/Cubs series later in the week. And he’ll probably touch on some of the “behavioral issues” that two high profile players, Milton Bradley and Carlos Zambrano, had on and off the field.

But damnit, I’m going to throw in my Curtis Jackson (50 cents for all you hip hop inclined honkies). To sum it up, Milton Bradley had some words with Sweet Lou Pinella in the dugout, resulting in Lou calling Milt a “piece of s***.” Actually, f*** that noise. This isn’t ESPN. Mickey Mouse ain’t my boss. Lou called him a piece of shit. THERE I SAID IT!!!

And Big Z?!??! I’m pretty sure he substituted the coffee and Red Bull before games with cocaine horse hallucinogens. Ball slipped out of his hand, flew into the dugout. Not a big deal. Until he took it out on a Gatorade cooler in the dugout.

To sum up, these guys would get check marks in the poor column for playing with others in their kindergarten report cards. We knew these guys were headcases. Well documented headcases. Cubs fans knew it too but, like T.O., Pacman and every other non-sensical, yet gifted person, the good outweighed the bad.

So any Cubs fan who wants to weigh in, please do. I can rip on Z and Milt all I want. I can make board game jokes about how Lou should take away Milt’s “Get out of jail free card” and kick his ass up and down Atlantic Avenue. Or that Zambrano is….bat shit crazy.

They’re making a combined 25 million dollars this year with no chance of trading them in sight. How is this going to turn out? I’ll pray to Allah tonight that it ends badly. But that’s the traditionalist in me.


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