Haves and Have-Nots: Cards/Cubs Series Preview

God's Handy Work. PWNED CUBS FANS!!!!

By Josh Mosley

Normally I would start off this post with some witty quip or analogy about baseball’s fiercest rivalry not named the Yanks/Sox. It’d be easy for me. I’m St. Louis born and bred. That means Josh ain’t got no love for the Cubs. But I want to take this time to talk about the importance of….

WAIT!!!! I GOT IT!!!!! This is actually an anecdote about Andy that I want to pass along. As we sat around this past fall, he made an interesting comment about his college life and sports. He loves the Cubs. Loves Notre Dame. Goes to Mizzou and thusly, and correctly loathes kU. Hates the Cards. Hates the White Sox. Hates USC.

So to recap:
2004: USC wins the national title. Cards go to World Series
2005: White Sox win first title since 1919. USC wins at Notre Dame via the “Bush Push.”
2006: Cards win World Series with 83-79 regular season
2007-2008: Cubs swept in first round after winning division; kU wins national title.

Not good, right. I’d feel bad for him if not for my dislike of Notre Dame and begrudging indifference to the others. But he always said that because of his location amidst Cards fans that the 2006 World Series was the worst of them all.

And that. Makes. Me. Feel. AWESOME!!! I know there are asshatted Cards fans that wouldn’t know a squeeze bunt from a Squeeze It drink. And the thing is that there are Cubs fans that are just like that. So literally the only thing that makes me feel for Andy is that he had to go to school in such an area where he is rained on with Cards Kool Aid.

Andy can come with the annoying fans, the current disparity in talent and the back-to-back division titles. Fine by me. But back-to-back division titles does not a franchise make. Chicago has shelled out a payroll that has likely ranked in the top five for the decade and have one playoff series win to show for it. I’m no Yankee basher but that’s the best comparison I can think of.

And to close: the reason I called this the Have’s and the Have Nots is for the one thing that I HAVE seen that Cubs fans that are my age, my parents age, my grandparents age, etc. have NOT seen: a World Series. On to the match-ups:

Thursday: Sean Marshall (0-0, 0.00 ERA) vs. Adam Wainwright (1-0, 1.74 ERA)
Friday: Carlos Zambrano (1-0, 3.00 ERA) vs. Kyle Lohse (2-0, 1.13 ERA)
Saturday: Ryan Dempster (1-0, 4.50 ERA) vs. Todd Wellemayer (1-1, 4.50 ERA)
Sunday: Ted Lilly (2-0, 3.86 ERA) vs. P.J. Walters (0-0, 0.00 ERA)

Let’s get it on!!!!

Brewers vs. Reds: Wrapped Up Just For YOU

By Danny Mehigan

Dingers for everyone!

For the last two years, the Reds have been the Brewers’ proverbial “asshole that always wins at their place.” Despite all the good Milwaukee has done at Miller Park in the last few years, Cincinnati doesn’t seem to care because they keep winning. Will that continue in 2009? Well, you probably know already. But in case you don’t, read on!

Monday – Reds 7, Brewers 6: On the off chance Brewers fans needed to see their pitchers give up more bases loaded walks after Suppan’s implosion Sunday night, Yovani Gallardo obliged by blowing an early 4-run lead on Monday. A bases-loaded walk, hit-by-pitch and an absolute BOMB by Edwin Encarnacion gave the Reds six runs in the 3rd inning, and the bullpens locked down both offenses as Cincinnati held on for the win. Corey Hart and J.J. Hardy went ya-ya for the Crew, who went 2-for 14(!) with runners in scoring position. God awful.

Tuesday – Reds 6, Brewers 1: Bronson Arroyo does not care for your diagnosis of carpal tunnel, as he went strong into the 7th inning on Tuesday night. He gave up a solo shot to Hardy, but that was all. He had the slow stuff working, getting Brewers hitters off balance and allowing the Reds to run away with the series win. Cincy added three runs in the 9th off Carlos Villanueva. Joey Votto continues to rake, knocking in two runs with a single and a double.

Wednesday – Brewers 9, Reds 3: Without Mike Cameron, this very well could have been a Reds sweep. Killa Cam (copyright: Cam’ron and Dipset) hit two home runs and an RBI double, and was helped by RBI doubles from Jason Kendall, Bill Hall and a 2-run shot by Rickie Weeks. Micah Owings pitched okay in his Reds starting debut, but the bullpen was his undoing. Chris Dickerson hit a 2-run homer to tie the game at 3 in the sixth inning, but alas, ’twas not enough.

Hot Fire Players of the Series: Mark DiFelice and Bronson Arroyo. DiFelice is a relative unknown middle reliever for Milwaukee. He appeared in all three games, throwing 4 scoreless innings and getting 5 strikeouts while only giving up three hits and a walk. If only anyone else in the Milwaukee bullpen found success to be a good idea … For Cincinnati, Arroyo locked down the Brewers lineup without much help from his offense. He went 6.1 innings, giving up just four hits and one run. Considering he almost started the year on the disabled list, he’s a strong 2-0 on the season. Too bad that carpal tunnel will curtail his guitar career …

Weak Sauce Players of the Series: Yovani Gallardo and Jared Burton. In need of a stopper after two tough losses to the Cubs, Gallardo was staked to a 5-1 lead and promptly blew it. In five innings, he only gave up 3 hits, but added four walks and a hit batsmen that all led to seven runs and another mystifying home loss for Milwaukee. Burton pitched a decent inning on Monday, but definitely ruined the chance for a sweep on Wednesday. Right after the Reds fought back to tie the game at 3, Burton kept spinning his slider right over the heart of the plate (note: spinning a slider is a terrible idea, unless you love giving up dingers). Two doubles and a home run later, the 3-3 tie was now an 8-3 Milwaukee lead and the game was essentially over. Get your game up, Yovani. And you too, Jared.

Records: Milwaukee 3-6 (2-4 at home). Cincinnati 4-4 (2-1 on the road).

Next up: Milwaukee heads to New York to face the Mets at the beginning of a 9-game road trip. Bush, Gallardo and Suppan shall be your pitchers.

Cincinnati scoffs at that mini-trip by continuing on its season-long 10-game trip in Houston for four games. Cueto, Harang, Volquez and Arroyo get the ball in H-town. No word on Paul Wall‘s thoughts on the series.

Cubs Series Recap vs. Rockies: RockApril!

by Andy Paschen

Photo credit: Andy Paschen. Writing and photography? That's why they call me the double threat. (note: they do not call me that)

Instead of giving you daily, instant recaps of games that have been played, here at Midwest Swing we are going to recap series instead, in hopes that a different perspective will give some insight and information that went previously unnoticed.

You taste that Cubs fans? That’s the subtle, smooth flavor of eating your words. You booed Jason Marquis when he was introduced on Tuesday, you booed Jason Marquis Wednesday and for that you were justly punished. Marquis no only shut the Cubs’ bats down, but also showed why he is a professional man of leisure by socking a two run single into center. Don’t blame me though, for I gave Jason Marquis a tepid applause when he was announced. Why? Because he wasn’t good enough to betray us by signing with another team last year and he wasn’t bad enough to cost the Cubs important games: Why boo him?

Cubs split the series: W-L
Cubs Series Record: 2-0-1 (5-3 overall)

Notes:

• Walks, walks, walks. On Tuesday, they Cubs drew nine walks. Cubs win. The next game the Cubs draw three walks. Cubs lose. As of Thursday, the Cubs are 4th in the N.L. in walks (2nd if you take out IBBs), which is a very good thing. Lou Piniella wanted high OBP guys and it looks like he’s got them.

• This is probably the most worthy thing I saw from Wednesday: A friend of a friend of a friend was wearing a Snuggie. I don’t like swearing, but she was wearing a fucking Snuggie. People caught wearing Snuggies should be punished accordingly, though I imagine they are punished by simply being dumb enough to purchase a Snuggie. What, is your arm too cold to movie it from out under the blanket? Life gets a lot harder than arm warmth, buddy, so if you’re struggling with that you might as well pack it in.

• The Cubs won Tuesday with their JV team. No Milton Bradley, no Aramis Ramirez, no Geovany Soto, no Carlos Marmol? No prob, Bob. But as Wednesday showed (though Soto did come back for that contest) the JV squad can’t play everyday because the consistency just isn’t there.

• Derrek Lee: 2-3 1 RBI, 2 BB on Tuesday, 3-4 1 HR, 1 RBI on Wednesday. It’s going to be very, very important for Lee to stroke this season. Here’s why: Ramirez, Bradley and Soto have already been hurt (not including the fact that Soto can’t play 130 games every year as a catcher), and Alfonso Soriano is no sure thing not to get hurt. That means that you could see a a lot of games with the heart of the order being Kosuke Fukudome, Lee, Fontenot. Think about it: I trash Fukudome — he steps up. I trash Derrek Lee — he steps up. I feel like Rob Schneider in Surf Ninjas.

Bullpen Grade:
Tuesday: A. Angel “El Pobrecito” Guzman got Ted Lilly out of a jam, and he, Aaron Heilman and Kevin Gregg helped hold the Rockies to one hit. Total.
Wednesday: A-. Rich Harden couldn’t go more than 3 innings, so the bullpen had to show up. 6 innings, 4 hits and 1 HR later they proved they could answer the call. The only blemish between David Patton, Luis Vizcaino, Neal Cotts and El Pobrecito was a Dexter Fowler double in the 8th that plated a run.
Bullpen season GPA: 2.96 (B). This series is the first that the bullpen has aced every test.

Tuesday’s Hero: Ted Lilly. 6 innings of no-hit baseball is an easy way to avoid the “Goat Bastard” label.
Wednesday’s Goat: Rich Harden. 3 innings, 100 pitches, 4 ER. I know that the 8 Ks look good, but not when you can’t make it to the 4th. Also, Mike Fontenot gets the goat for getting hosed at 3rd in the 9th with the game tying run at the plate. You don’t make the first out at 3rd, right? Because of this, Fontenot is our first player to get on the Hero list and the Goat list. Pick a side Fontenot, and I suggest you choose wisely.

Hero/Goat season leaders:
Hero Squad: Fontenot, Fukudome, Reed Johnson, Lilly, Soriano,  Carlos Zambrano – 1. You know what that is? That’s balance right there.
Goat Bastards: Bradley, Cotts, Fontenot, Gregg, Harden – 1

Up next: A war as old as time. Sort of. The Cardinals come to town, along with their annoying fans and drunk manager.